Alright so last night I was scrolling, right? Saw this clip of Rihanna just owning the floor at some event, then immediately after, Naomi Campbell’s iconic walk from like the 90s popped up. And man, the confidence! I thought, “How hard can it actually be? Looks kinda natural, maybe?” So yeah, decided right there on the couch to try learning their moves today. Spoiler: it ain’t natural.
Getting Started: Setting The (Very Amateur) Stage
First things first. I cleared the biggest patch of floor in the living room. Moved the coffee table – nearly took out a lamp doing that. Grabbed my sturdiest pair of heels, not even close to runway height, but they click. Figured I needed music. Put on some Rihanna track loud enough to feel it but not annoy the neighbours.
My thought process was simple:
- Step 1: Just stand right. Posture. Shoulders back, chin up. Easy? Thought so. Stood in front of the big mirror looking all awkward. Felt stiff. Had to constantly remind myself: “Shoulders DOWN. Back straight. Don’t slouch!”
- Step 2: The stance. Naomi has this power stance. Tried to mimic it. One foot slightly forward, weight back. Felt… unnatural, like I was about to topple backwards. Shifted my weight. Still weird.
The First (Disastrous) Steps
Okay. Posture kinda sorted-ish. Time to move. Aiming for that Rihanna vibe first: cool, effortless, a bit of swagger.
- Attempt 1: Took a step. More like a clomp. Tripped slightly over my own foot trying to look “chill”. Arms didn’t know what to do! Looked like I was searching for a handrail.
- Attempt 2: Focused on putting one foot directly in front of the other. Sounds simple. IS NOT SIMPLE. My hips felt locked. Walked a super straight line okay-ish, but looked like a robot soldier, not a superstar. Zero cool factor.
- Attempt 3: Tried the hips. Oh boy. That hip sway thing they do? Looks amazing on them. On me? It started as a slight swing, felt good! Then I overcompensated. Twisted too hard, lost my balance on the heel, grabbed the bookshelf to avoid eating carpet. Mortifying.
Switching Gears: Naomi Mode (High Heels, High Fear)
Got discouraged. Thought maybe Rihanna’s cool walk wasn’t for me. Switched to trying that powerful, long-stride Naomi Campbell walk I remember so well.
Yeah, worse idea.
- Step 1: Trying to take those HUGE, assertive strides she does. Almost did the splits unintentionally. My legs are not that long. Felt ridiculous stretching that far.
- Step 2: The fierce face. Standing in the mirror trying to look “intense” and “powerful”. Achieved “mildly constipated”. Not good.
- Step 3: Combining it all: long stride, hip motion (controlled this time!), intense face, arms swinging purposefully. It lasted three steps. Then the stride length made my heel catch the floor edge. Wobble. Wobble. Wobble. Had to bail and step out of the shoe. Epic fail.
Small Victories & Realizations
After way too many near-ankle twists and silent prayers not to break anything, I slowed down. Ditched trying to be Rihanna or Naomi directly.
- Found something that worked (slightly): Started walking the straight line again. Kept shoulders back. Focused ONLY on placing the heel down first, then rolling through the foot smoothly to the toe. Click. Step. Click. Step. Did that for ages, walking back and forth. It started feeling less robotic.
- Then I added ONE THING: A tiny, tiny hip shift with each step. Not forced. Just letting the leg movement naturally cause a small sway. HUGE difference. Instantly looked less stiff. Still nowhere near theirs, but actually passable.
- The Big Realization: Their walks look effortless because it’s drilled in muscle memory. The posture, the arm swing (didn’t even get into that properly!), the way the foot hits the floor perfectly… all of it. Every piece has to work together. It’s like learning to ride a bike again, but in heels trying not to die.
End of session? Feet kinda hurt. Pride a little bruised. But I kinda, almost, for a few steps, felt the tiniest bit smoother than when I started. Gotta keep practicing before I walk down the canned food aisle like that though. Takes way more work than I thought!
