My Stupid Plan To Actually Score Cheap Jordans
Look, I was tired of seeing folks flip Jordans for insane cash. Wanted that pair dropping Saturday without paying stupid prices. Figured I’d give it a shot myself. Here’s the dumb stuff I actually did:
Step 1: Found My Targets & Got My Fake Info Ready
- Checked which stores near me got the shoes. Website lists suck, so I used a sneaker forum’s leak. Real messy, lists change hourly.
- Made fake accounts. Like, multiple. Used different emails, burner phone numbers I got from some app. Probably broke a dozen terms of service right there.
- Saved payment stuff. Used a prepaid card? Yep. Put just enough cash on it for one pair. Figured it was safer if something went wrong.
- Practice run? Totally! Went on some cheap clearance drop earlier in the week. Added to cart, tried to checkout fast. Site crashed, obviously. But kinda got the feel.
Step 2: The Absolute Chaos On Launch Morning
Sat there at 9:55 AM Saturday, coffee gone cold. Hit refresh like a madman on three tabs, phone app open. Exactly at 10:00 AM:
- My main tab loaded first. Hit add to cart faster than I ever clicked anything. Spinning wheel… forever.
- Tab 2? Error page. Felt like throwing the laptop.
- Phone app? Frozen. Just stuck. Classic.
- Finally! After maybe 90 seconds (felt like an hour), main tab jumped – “Added to Cart”. Sweet relief!
Step 3: The Dirty Checkout Race
Got the shoes in the cart? Half the battle. The checkout war started:
- Logged into my fake account quick. Typed like my fingers were on fire.
- Auto-fill helped kinda. Had to fix the zip code. Wasted seconds!
- Prepaid card details? Triple checked ’em. Miss one number, you’re dead.
- Saw the shipping options for half a second. Took the absolute cheapest. Didn’t care if the carrier used pigeons.
- Hit “Complete Order”… More spinning. Heart actually pounding. Then… the screen changed. Saw the order number! Almost fell off my chair.
So… Did This Actually Work?
Surprisingly… yeah. Got the confirmation email. Box showed up 3 days later. Checked resell prices after… saved myself a good $150 bucks. Easy? Hell no. Felt like dodging bots and angry dudes online. Takes serious prep beforehand and nerves of steel clicking stuff. Still cheaper than paying the hype beast tax though. Feels like winning the dang lottery. Need a nap now.
