Alright, so the CMT Awards red carpet for 2024 was coming up, and I figured, you know, this year I’m gonna actually do something with it. Not just passively watch. I wanted to get into the nitty-gritty, my own little observation project.
My Grand Plan (or so I thought)
I decided I was going to track every single instance of over-the-top glitter. Seriously. Sequins, glitter fabric, those shiny metallic threads, the works. I had this idea that maybe I could spot a pattern, or see if it was more prevalent with new artists versus the old guard. Sounded like a solid plan, right? Get some real data, maybe write a little something about it. I even made a little chart beforehand.
So, I got all set up. Brewed a big pot of coffee, grabbed my notebook, pen at the ready. The pre-show started, and the first few folks started walking the carpet. I was leaning in, eyes peeled, trying to make notes. “Okay, first one, definitely glitter bomb. Check.” It was all systems go, for about ten minutes.
Where it All Went Sideways
Then, well, reality hit. First off, the camera work. Good grief. One second it’s a nice clear shot, the next it’s zooming in on someone’s eyeball, or panning so fast you’d get whiplash. Trying to accurately assess the glitter level on a moving target with a jumpy camera? Way harder than I thought.
And then the sheer volume! After about the fifth person who looked like they’d taken a bath in craft supplies, my detailed notes started to look more like frantic scribbles. My categories of “subtle shimmer,” “moderate sparkle,” and “full disco ball” just weren’t cutting it. It was mostly “full disco ball.”
I found myself getting distracted too. Instead of just clinically noting the glitter, I started actually listening to the interviews. Big mistake if you want to stay focused on fabric finishes.
- Someone would be talking about their heartfelt new song, and I’d be there muttering, “Yeah, yeah, but is that lamé or just really aggressive sequins?”
- Or I’d miss a whole outfit because they cut to a commercial right when a new person stepped out.
- And the lighting! Sometimes it made everything look sparkly, even if it probably wasn’t.
My meticulous glitter tracking? It pretty much devolved into me just sighing every time another human glitter ball walked into frame. The chart was a mess. My grand data project was D.O.A.
What I Actually Ended Up Doing
So, I kind of abandoned the strict glitter count. Instead, I just started watching. And what I ended up “practicing” was more like people-watching, I guess. I started noticing the little things. The slightly forced smiles when they’d been asked the same question for the tenth time. The way some artists genuinely lit up talking about their music, while others looked like they were just trying to remember their lines.
I noticed who seemed comfortable and who looked like they were wearing clothes that someone else picked out and cost more than their car. It became less about the fashion specifics and more about the whole, you know, spectacle of it all. The machine.
Honestly, by the end, my main takeaway wasn’t about glitter trends at all. It was more like, “Wow, that looks exhausting.” All that posing, all those lights, all that pressure to say the right thing. My notes shifted from “Glitter Score: 9/10” to “Looks like they need a nap.”
So, yeah. My “red carpet cmt 2024” practice didn’t quite go as planned. No groundbreaking analysis of sparkle. But hey, I did get a pretty good look at the whole circus. Maybe next year I’ll try tracking how many cowboy hats actually look authentic. Or maybe I’ll just order a pizza and enjoy the show. We’ll see.
